Up and Coming

June 15, 2016June 14, 2016 / morgancreynolds / Leave a comment

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I’m not interested in going back.

I choose to live in the future. Our lives are meant to be faced forward, not dwelling on past days.

Ahhh, it’s easy to remember the good old days.

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I find myself tempted by that option. Goodness. My kids are growing up and I’m not as young as I used to be. There are loads of happy memories and experiences to wander through. But, I’m not camping out.

What was is done.

What God gave then–I hold with such fondness so many beautiful gifts. I love my kids and all their lives mean to me and all those beautiful memories.

But, to stay there is not life. Life is best lived moving forward.

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Some folks get caught in the golden memories. The way things were.

The answers and miracles and fondness of memories. I just wonder, though, if by refusing to move forward, what we are really saying is God can not be trusted. He will not do equal wonders in the future. They will certainly look different, but they will be no less awe-inspiring.

I choose forward.

God has great things planned for the future. The future days excite me!

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A new day calls for new ways (Let me be clear—not new truth.) Perhaps to not move forward feels safest and gives a more solid footing. God has future plans that are bigger and brighter than those of the past. If we stay in the past, we miss the opportunity of bringing along the new people here today.

The prophet told us clearly,

“God has a plan for our future. Good plans. Plans of hope and peace.”

God is always working with the future in mind.

That was the whole point of Christ’s coming.

photo-1440999189875-aec750e026f4 It’s easy to get caught up in the swooning over past memories. We tend to clean up and spruce up many of our memories. Sometimes we revise the history in our minds. Time is an equalizer. Anyhow, it is no longer with us.

I choose a forward moving life.

It’s a new day. What was is over.

Hopefully, I have learned what I can from the past and will be able to carry it into the future. There is such beauty and peace walking into the future knowing God has me. I am His.

Give me forward facing folks anytime.

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They understand the path is not charted and could get bumpy.

We don’t live in a utopian frame of mind. We know, because of experience, God is present regardless of bumps and roadblocks. If I have learned anything over the last years is God never leaves. Never. I fought that battle in my mind years ago, and now carry that hard-won truth with me into the future.

I wonder. Do people not think God will be present if they move forward? I imagine there could be that fear. But, that truth has to be won…even fought for…in our hearts. Better to learn this sooner, rather than later!

Forward.

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It is the seeking of what lies ahead.

Refusing to be held back by what may have worked or not have worked in the past. Not insisting I do it my way. Holding firmly to the belief that God is a God of wonders and mystery. Actively seeking a forward moving mindset.

It isn’t saying the past is invalid.

photo-1444011283387-7b0f76371f12 It is saying, “I am good with the past. I am at peace with the past. But, I am excited at what God yet has for me.” Pretty simple.

I won’t be defined by the past, but merely informed by and beautifully shaped by it.

The gifts I carry into the future are beautiful and costly. Rare and exquisite gifts. Gifts obtained by tears and prayers and even some sweat and blood. And, I hold dearly to these gifts as I move forward.

I am moving forward!

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Do Over!

June 2, 2016June 2, 2016 / morgancreynolds / 2 Comments

photo-1429277158984-614d155e0017 Starting over.

It is exhilarating and terrifying–all at once.

It’s a quirky thing.

When you have no urgent need to start over, well, one doesn’t really feel the urge.

You might look at your circumstances and see no real avenue for starting over. But, when the moment comes, it’s amazing what you can do.

We never anticipated the opportunity to start over would come so quickly. We had a long-range goal of changing things up. A few years out. Making the grand leap. But, life quickly and unexpectedly launched other plans into our laps. Plot twist!

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It’s what I think a hot air balloon ride might be like. We’ve untetherd and now we are gliding…praying and waiting and letting the air gusts take us further and further. It’s quiet up here. The view is spectacular! We see a landing spot, but we may end up being a little to the left or a smidge to the right.

Sometimes that feels incredibly amazing and other times it feels more unnerving that exhilarating. All I know to do is keep our eye on the prize and the God that is directing us home.

It’s cool to be front and center in the hot air balloon. Not on the ground below watching from a distance.

bXoAlw8gT66vBo1wcFoO_IMG_9181 I have no idea what the final portrait will look like. But, God keeps dropping bits and pieces before us. This great mystery is ever so slowly revealing itself—one twist and turn at a time.

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Have you ever started over?

If I am being completely honest, I sometimes dreamed of doing something other than pastoring a church. Making a difference in a new way.

We lived out this calling for 25 years and watched amazing God-moments unfold before us. And, as life goes, struggles and challenges came, too. It’s all in a life’s work. So many miraculous results and some comical failures to round it all out.

But, here we are.

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Starting over.

And, honestly, I am excited!

Someone asked us yesterday if we miss what we were doing before. And the answer is a pretty simple no. We miss some of the people. But, we are looking forward and ahead. We are not dwelling on what has been, but on what will be.

I don’t know where you stand. But, it’s a great time to start over.

I recently read Ann Voskamp’s blog post, at A Holy Experience, about June being a great month to start over. You should check it out here. It sparked me to think. What a joy to be able to have a do-over in life. To move into new dreams. Hope and excitement bubble up inside when I think we are actually doing it! Honestly, there is no room for fear.

People usually think of starting over when the calendar rolls over to January each new year. A new calendar; a new start. But, June. Now, is the best time ever!

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It’s a fresh new season. New motivation! New, fresh drive. The dark and dreary is behind. Studies show starting new health habits and changes may actually be easier in the springtime than in January–a dark and dreary month. The winter often lends itself to hibernating and digging in. Spring brings motivation and new life and busting out!

So, here we are. It’s a new day; it’s a new, fresh season.

Not just on the calendar, but for your life as well.

If you are ever as blessed as us to have a do-over…take it!

photo-1445249029690-d729bbc73bcf Now is the best time. Go for it! See where your passions and the pulling of your heart are. Follow your dreams! Listen to your heart’s desire. Don’t wait another day!

It’s a beautiful day for a do-over.

It doesn’t have to be a complete, whole-sale do-over like we have done. Maybe there is simply an area of your life that needs change and a fresh start. Throw open the windows! Why not?

Do it now!

Give yourself permission to explore the landscape and the possibilities.

Be brave and courageous! It’s beautiful up here! You’ll love the view!

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I would love to hear how you are taking a do-over in your life! Leave a comment. Join in on this discussion…life is better together! Here’s to new beginnings!

What’s That Noise?

March 16, 2016March 15, 2016 / morgancreynolds / Leave a comment

There is so much noise.

Everywhere.

Do you ever get tired of it?

Do you ever just wish it would stop?

I do.

There are opinions from all corners of the globe. They run 24 hours a day.

Constant, instant, unsolicited and often discouraging. Anywhere, anytime, about anything.

Oh, there is beneficial and helpful information out there. But, I dare say, I know I open my heart too often to the negative and non-life giving chants of society. And it is anything but helpful!

What can we do to protect ourselves from the noise and chaos?

Set boundaries.
Unplug.
Meditate.
Focus on others.

To be quite honest, I struggle with most of these. It is almost impossible to shut out this flow of unending information. But, these are some helpful steps to eliminating the noise pollution in our worlds.

Setting boundaries. This simply means guarding your heart and mind. What do you subscribe to? What groups and people do you follow on social media? Do they uplift and support your values? If not, clean out your pages and feeds. Only allow access into your heart and mind, voices of life and wisdom. You are going to have to replace the negative with the positive.

Unplug. I am terrible at this one. My mother has even pled with me to give it a try. I unplugged the other day for several hours while on vacation. I had to be brave and make the jump at my husband’s insistence. I am way too attached to the constant scrolling and observing and mind numbing. But, I did it and it was wonderful! And, I learned I could make it just fine. I will do it again.

Meditate. We have to make a specific and concentrated effort to stop and listen to Christ. He has instruction and guidance and wisdom we need each day. I struggle to stop and quiet my heart. There are too many times I run through my day hoping to get it right. I too often fly solo without having taken the time regroup and recharge. I run on old information.

Focus on others. When we focus on other people and help them, we don’t have time to feed our souls with junk. When we serve, we are more like Christ. When we give to others, we aren’t searching for false validation from voices that haven’t earned the right to speak into our lives. As we give to others, we will find we need to have something to give away. We have to take away the negative and replace that emptiness with the positive.

Sometimes the opinions and narratives I tell myself create the chaos and noise.

When I have consumed a steady diet of lies or negativity, I retell myself this same stuff. We believe everything we tell ourselves.

A little scary, isn’t it?

I know I am guilty of tearing myself down. I listen to the stream of negativity as a captive audience.

Not the right weight.

Not smart enough.

Not strong enough.

Not good enough.

Not doing enough.

Bad mom.

Terrible at homeschooling.

Failure.

Rejected.

Disorganized mess……………………….

And, if I’m not careful, the list runs on and on. I wouldn’t allow someone else to fill my world, or anyone else’s, with that kind of noise. Why do I sit by and allow it for my own heart?

Honestly, it takes hard work to fight and resist.

It takes following the four steps to bring quiet out of the chaos of our world. Do the hard work. We can’t speak life and peace to our own hearts and minds if we are surrounded with negative images and noise. Otherwise, we won’t make room for the life Christ wants to give.

I need to be mindful of the voices I listen to and allow in my world.

I am so worth it

and so are you!

Life is Beautiful!

March 7, 2016March 6, 2016 / morgancreynolds / 10 Comments

During these last few months, I have been on quite a learning curve. If I’m honest, I have to say I recommend a mid-life plot twist and I don’t! It’ll be the ride of your life!

But, really.

Just imagine going back to graduation—high school or college—just as a young whipper snapper. With all sorts of possibilities and the world as your oyster, you look with anticipation toward all your options. That is where we are. And it is breathtakingly beautiful and scary–all at the same time!

I remember a couple of years back being envious of my oldest as he was setting off for his first year at university. So much youthful excitement and a no holds barred approach–I was envious.

I was so excited for him and all the unscripted future had for him. I remembered what it was like to have your whole life ahead of you. So much hope and promise. So much anticipation to follow new paths and dreams!

And, now, here I am. I am ready.

I have spent 25 years of ministry serving as a pastor’s wife. I use to tell my Love, I love being his wife, no doubt about that. Just maybe not a “pastor’s wife” sometimes. I learned much and gave everything I had. The role comes with difficult tasks. With some cool opportunities and blessings thrown in along the way, too. Now, though, I am ready to do new things…serve in a different way.

Our new beginning is before us.

Given to us as a gift.

Staring into the sunshine, the road is wide open in front of us.

Only this time I have three world-changers in tow. This road we chose over 25 years ago, has presented them with many unique challenges and opportunities. Each child has processed and walked them out differently.

As I sit and look at the bright and shining future, we have these amazing kids to guide and shepherd. This time around, it is not a solitary journey or private decision to be made. Change is hard for even the strongest of us. I have no doubt God has a beautiful future for each in my tribe. We just have to guide them into this bright new future.

Shepherding.

That was the word God gave me for this season with my babies (they will always be my babies. can we just agree to let me call them that? just humor me!) Even with all the excitement of a bright future the transitioning has been challenging. More so for some than others. Loss is hard. But God is greater.

My Love and I must shepherd our children well through this transition.

We have a responsibility to guide our children through the shadows. Through the tears. The goal is to get EVERYONE to the other side. I told my youngest Little,

“In this family, we are all for one, and one for all”.

We stop and sit with, pick up and carry, hold the hand, give love and receive love. We shepherd our children through the pain of rejection, loss, betrayal, and disappointment.

No one will be left behind.

I have always hated the pre-flight airline spiel about putting your own mask on first and then your children’s. I understand the logic and know it is best. But, my overly compassionate self screams, “I will put their’s on first, thank you very much!” But, that doesn’t really make sense, does it?

So, I have decided I am in a similar spot in my life. It is time for me to get my oxygen mask on first and then I can administer life breath to them.

These world-changers deserve the very best I can give them.

There is wisdom to give and hope to share. There are dreams to help them dream. There is a future brighter than anything of the past. Even with all the beauty we did experience, there is more to be had.

I need something to give to them. So, here is what I am going to do to strengthen myself.

Exercise and build physical strength.
Write…which is following my own dream.
Give creative Bible journaling a try.
Attend weekly worship at a safe and loving church.
Read for enjoyment and growth.
Stay accountable to wisdom.

There it is.

I have been busy working hard to keep my family between the ditches…putting out fires, battling fears and wiping tears. Because, sometimes life just hurts. All of that is incredibly important.

But, now it is time for me to get out of that defensive position and into the intentional, offensive position.

Now, here is the next important piece of the puzzle.

My Love is leading spiritually intentional and strategic discussions during dinner on Wednesday evenings.

With a preteen and a teenager in the house, it can’t get too serious or stifling. But, God gave this idea as the perfect way for us to shepherded them. Like most moms, I do much of the crisis management throughout the days; one of Dad’s roles is to give purposeful direction. They need his voice and strength cloaked in velvet.

We will not allow the negative to win. We will not leave anyone behind. We have bright future days. I will not live on the defensive, but work from a place of intention and strength. For what the enemy means for destruction, God transforms into beauty. He will shepherd us. We only need to cooperate.

Who Do You Trust?

July 29, 2015July 28, 2015 / morgancreynolds / Leave a comment

I can remember sitting on the edge of the bed with each of my children. Or sometimes it was sitting with them curled up next to me on the sofa. We were having one of our many heart to heart talks. To me, those are some of my most treasured moments. As they poured out their concerns or dreams from their tender hearts, I intently listened. Sometimes, I didn’t have an answer; lots of times I did. The one thing I remember teaching them is this,

“If it matters to you then it matters to God.”

Sometimes, their concern was over a lost toy or an unfortunate situation. Other times, their concern was the bigger-than-life dreams they were dreaming. Either way, I often brought them back to this one thought.

If it matters to you then it matters to God.

In this life we need hope. Not a misguided and misplaced hope, but a hope rooted in the strength and care of God. This isn’t a false hope. It was never promised that God was our genie in a bottle looking to grant every wish. They understood that. We might not get the response we want, but God gives the very best He knows we need.

God looks at our hearts with care. He sees all the things in future days we can not see. He sees where our choices lead. He knows what we need. But, the really cool thing is God cares about the things we care about. He created us and knows us.

This is a great comfort for my soul. Our desires are not petty or insignificant. In fact, if He knew us before we were ever in our mother’s womb, wouldn’t that include what our desires and interests would be? We are not created out of chance.

This thought always seemed to comfort my children. And, in the the process, I was aiming for a deep heart connection with the One who created them. I know they take this thought with them even now. Now, they are older. The stakes are quite a bit higher. Just the other day my oldest needed a reminder. I think we all need to be reminded at points along the journey. When the cost is higher or the dream is bigger and when we aren’t talking about lost childhood trinkets, we need to remember. Now, we are talking about which paths to walk, which choices to make, which dreams to dream. Or, maybe it is about provision in the real world—having real needs in this real world. But, perhaps, it is something you think is small and insignificant, and doesn’t even warrant an audience with God.

If it matters to you then it matters to God.

Fear need not rule the day. Our Father hears and knows. He’s got us. Who do you trust? I mean, REALLY trust. Are you trusting in yourself to get things done and to make it happen? Do you have dreams and desires and believe you are the only one to get it done? Maybe that is your life track record–“If it is to be then it’s up to me!” No one ever sat with you and really listened to what was burdening your soul. Well, I’m here today to tell you it matters. It all matters.

Does it matter to you? Then it matters to God.

He’s not a magic genie looking to grant you three wishes. But, He does care about what keeps you up at night and aches in your heart. Trusting only in ourselves leads to a weary and worn soul.

Things haven’t turned out quite how you wanted? Things don’t really look like what you dreamed of in your heart? He cares. And, what’s even best, He sees the right answer for every situation. Scripture teaches us to cast our burden on Him because He cares for us. I’m amazed at all of the times God has revealed Himself to my children. Children. He has proven Himself over and over to them. And, even though they are children, they have experienced some tough stuff. And so, they are learning He can be trusted.

You may not be a child anymore, but He is waiting to listen. If He will reveal Himself to a child, He will reveal Himself to you. What is it that matters to you? What is aching in your soul?

If it matters to you then it matters to Him!

A Letter To My Loves

July 15, 2015July 14, 2015 / morgancreynolds / 2 Comments

To Our Loves,

As your Dad and I celebrate our 24th wedding anniversary, I hope you have witnessed a growing, deep love. It’s hard to believe we are at 24…..next year is 25 and we will be celebrating in fine style! But until then….

Your Dad and I met in 1988. I know it seems so very long ago. We married in 1991 while we were young and full of dreams. I suggest you marry when your heart is full of love and bright with dreams. Young love can be challenging, and I often say older is probably better. But, here’s what I know, your dreams grow together and you figure out life with someone close by your side when you start out younger. Life is good in pairs. That may not work out for you exactly like that, but if your heart is open, your head is solidly on your shoulders and feet are firmly planted on the ground, run through this life together. You won’t have all the money you need (and money is really good!), but God will provide if you listen closely to Him.

You will never find the “perfect” Mr. or Mrs. Right. Everyone has flaws. You have to decide what you can live with and what is non-negotiable. Nobody you love will be perfect. Absolutely nobody. So, if you find love and depth of character, decide whether you can live this life without them. Some flaws are obviously worse than others. Run! Run, like the wind! But, you know I have taught you, they need to love Jesus, serve Him and love their family. Of course, each of you have things you love and desire and things that won’t fly. Listen to your heart! My sweet girl, if you can find someone like your Daddy, you will be a woman most blessed. My strong men, I hope in some way I have shown you what a Jesus-loving wife should represent.

Love hits bumps and gets bruises. The real beauty comes from walking out whatever life has to throw at you. Not running away. It’s the living out grace and faith through the rough patches. It isn’t always pretty or easy, but marriage isn’t just about you. The other person doesn’t complete you—you are whole just as you are. One goal of marriage is to help your Love fulfill their dreams. And together, if you both do that, you will achieve more than you ever could on your own.

As you journey together, you will change and grow. So will the Love of your life. That is good. When you are Jesus followers, He will change you and grow you. So, encourage them to grow. Life is a journey; and, no, you will not know what you or your Love will look like 24 years from the day you walk down the aisle. But, if you open your hearts and journey together, you come out on the other side even better than when you started out.

Our journey has been filled with so much fun! Trips to Walt Disney World, the Rocky Mountains and the Grand Canyon. Trips to the ocean and visits to opposite coasts. Trips to other countries and close to home. So many fabulous memories! Life is what you make it. Marriage is too. Don’t wait for the golden years or someday to live life. Do what you can, when you can. You aren’t promised those yonder days. Make the most of now. It may mean you have to do it with some financial finesse, but do it nonetheless.

Remember, the children don’t run the corner office! Teach them there is something out there bigger than them. They can’t survive without that! And, that, my dears, starts at home. Your marriage is first. Your Love is first. Yes, there are seasons in which the children’s activities will dominate the schedule. But, remember your love comes first. Do what you can, when you can! Date nights and time and moments have to be taken. Learn your Love’s love language and do what you can to meet it. It may be a stretch for you to think outside the box of your own idea of love, but do it. Try hard! Give it all you’ve got! Children need to see their parents in love. That is when they are most secure. Oh, they will complain and be grossed out—gross them out anyway!

Many times, you will be called upon to sacrifice. That is life. Sometimes you will have to give more than you think you have to give. Many times you will have to set yourself aside for the moment and give out of yourself so your Love can have what they need. And they will have to do the same. I know this flies against the current culture. Often times you will find a godly marriage will. Many times, a godly marriage will have to go counter-culture to survive and grow. In fact, I will say, most of the time you will find yourself needing to live counter-culture to protect your family. Do it! Make the sacrifice! Your home, your family and all that is to come will depend on it.

There is so much more to say that comes from 24 years of marriage. But, I’m sure that will come in time. I wouldn’t change it for the world! Yes, I wish I had done some things differently. I wish I had loved better and understood more. But life and love is a journey. Your Dad is a great example of loving—many times I feel he has done it better than I. But, we are in it for the distance! We’ve been through a lot, but we’ve also experienced so much laughter, joy and love. I wouldn’t do this journey with anybody else.

Choose wisely, my Loves! But don’t be afraid! Love and marriage aren’t perfect, but definitely worth the effort!

Fits and Starts

June 8, 2015June 7, 2015 / morgancreynolds / 4 Comments

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Life comes in seasons.

Dreams and their fulfilling often come in fits and starts.

It feels like taking two steps forward and one step backward.

Sometimes, it might even feel as if nothing is happening at all.

Or, maybe it even feels like your dreams are unraveling before your eyes.

I continue to come across this quote,

“Sometimes when things are falling apart they may actually be falling into place.”

I like it.

I’ve often found this to be true in my life.

Maybe the waiting and wanting isn’t the problem.

Maybe that’s all part of the plan.

Sometimes, I get this picture in my mind of God sitting and watching and chuckling. Maybe He even looks at us and gives a wink. He watches us, you know. He didn’t just throw us out and leaving us flailing and falling, hoping we would find our wings and catch the wind. No, He is much more benevolent and kind. I imagine He must wonder at times why we take so long. Circling the same mountain over and over and over again. All the while, He is ready to reveal something super amazing!

We have to get out of our heads and out of the way.

So, on this, maybe I finally have.

My season of focusing solely on my family is slightly shifting. Nothing extreme or world shattering. Just a slight shift. Ever subtle, but it is enough to teach me something. For a while, I realized I didn’t have any dreams. Maybe life or crises or anxiety or depression does that. But, I found myself in that place. I found it nearly debilitating. It made me freeze in fear. How can I not have a dream?

I’m an “all in” kind of person. If I do something, it requires me to be all in. 100% full throttle in. So, that is how I mother and support my husband. A husband, three kids and a dog. Big life changes came with our firstborn stepping into college. So many things to keep up with and love and do. Thinking up a dream wasn’t really on the “To Do List”.

But, all the while I knew God had something for me to do in addition to my love of home. I kept circling and circling the mountain of purpose. It just led to discontent and sadness. It came in cycles and started coming with more and more frequency. It was just enough to unnerve and unsettle me and knock me from a place of contentment.

It’s cool how these moments force you to make the next step. It is almost like walking up a staircase…with the constant bumping into the step above you, but never able to rise up to it.

This is where I had found myself in the last couple of years.

But, life and dreams work slowly.

It isn’t a fast journey.

It takes collecting experiences and learning what is needed.

It is stopping and starting.

It is waiting and walking.

It is leaning in and pushing away.

And, if you are wrapped up in Christ, He is right in the middle of it all. Right there.

Watching and speaking.

Calling and loving.

Gently coaxing, and calmly pulling us back.

It all feels frustrating at times and even discouraging if we are honest.

The fits and starts and the collecting of experience—painful and beautiful alike.

It all serves to bring us to the place we need to be.

Slowly by slowly, the edges soften and light begins to shine through. Maybe not much at first. Perhaps, so faint you are afraid it will disappear if you turn away. But, oh, how journeying through the desert and circling the mountain teaches you so much!

I’ve learned a good deal about myself in all of this.

I’ve collected memories and thoughts and, most of all, some wisdom along the way. So, here I am. Seeing a very faint but distinct shimmer. I sit and listen quietly, searching and looking for signs and signals, hearing the wind blow and stir. My heart knows. New days and paths are leading me to what lies ahead. My heart knows nothing is wasted or useless. My heart knows its priority and first love. Even when circling a mountain I had grown entirely too familiar with, God was watching…and waiting. He was listening and shaping.

It doesn’t matter how hard you scream for your dream.

If it isn’t time for the dawning of the dream, it isn’t going to happen. God knows you. He knows your dream. He knows His dream for you. You are far too important to prematurely birth your dream. And besides, the birthing in and of itself is a long process. From the first glimpse of shimmer to full blown reality is often longer still.

But, keep this in mind. It. Is. Coming.

So, journey around the mountain. Listen and call. Watch and seek. Learn and release. And, wait. But, just do something to prepare for your dream. Waiting doesn’t mean being idle. Waiting is work. Wait and seek. Only He knows the real outcome for your dream.

I’m sure I will circle more mountains on my way. One dream is maybe not enough for my one, magnificent life. Here, though, is the lesson I am learning on the way.

I am doing great things with my life…even now. I may not be notable or noteworthy, but I am doing what I should be doing. And, as the time comes I will be ready to step into the dreams I am now dreaming. It’s time for me to dream. I think I’m getting it…and I think He is chuckling.

Off We Go!

April 13, 2015April 12, 2015 / morgancreynolds / 1 Comment

A good old fashioned swing.

I think it must be the closest feeling a child has to soaring. I remember as a kid on the playground pumping higher and higher…once I got the pumping figured out. The cool kid thing was jumping from the swing at the peak. Probably not the safest! I was horrified when my kids tried it. My younger brother did it once….landed flat on his back. Hurt himself, he did. Yeah….no jumping from swings, kids!

I think we all long to soar.

We want to soar with our dreams.

Pumping and pumping until we reach the heights. I know I do….but, I really, really want my kiddos to soar. My oldest is a big dreamer. He has always had a creative imagination and I often felt I was trying to hold fast to a bucking bronco. He has always had so much he wants to do. I never could quite keep up! He inspired our made up word—exhausterating!

I never ever want to be a dream killer.

Some dreams are often unrealistic. I want to be my child’s biggest cheerleader. Life has a way of killing dreams. I’m not going to be guilty of doing it. I will train and guide my children on a path which leads to fulfilling their dreams. Whatever God has for them….He will lead them.

Giving them wings is a little like stomping on your heart one day and thrilling it with joy the next. My firstborn is pumping his wings fiercely. As the time grew near for him to soar from the nest, my heart couldn’t comprehend it. I had given so much of my life to this cute little boy who easily held my heart. How was I supposed to give him wings when I wasn’t sure I wanted him out of my nest in the first place?

The fear of the unknown was almost debilitating. Much weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth took place. Until one day, a wise lady basically told me to get over it. I’m not kidding. Her kids are grown and she has a great-grandbaby, maybe two.

But, I was bemoaning on Facebook about the nest emptying of one, and she told me to think of all the greatness to come. There would be great joy on the flip side; an adult relationship with your offspring is incredibly rewarding! But, I have to adjust my thinking. I had to rethink this and keep moving forward.

At first, I have to say, it jolted me.

It felt rough and scratchy.

But, it wiggled its way into my brain and heart.

I sat in his bedroom, after the dorm move in day, and cried my way through the mess that was left behind. I cried and scratched and clawed my way through a week, or maybe just two. Sobbing even, maybe. Until one day, my littlest Little asked if I still loved them—the ones who were still there with me in the nest. I knew it was time to pull on the big girl panties and fully embrace this new day. And slowly, I began to see. I was excited to see him try his new way; walk his own path. His joy was my joy.

When our children soar, our hearts soar with them.

It has been a giving and taking and figuring it all out. You know, the normal boundaries stuff, and the mom in me worrying stuff, and I want you home this weekend stuff. It has been good. Mine is about to finish his first year of college. I can’t even imagine it. Oh, the soaring he has done!

There have been some clunky landings and stormy skies. But, that is the soaring life. How did he get the wings to fly, you ask?

We certainly don’t have all the answers, here are 5 things we did:

Teach him he can do anything and everything God has for him to do. He stirs the passion of our hearts to do good things. Make sure he knows we believe 100% in him.
Give him solid roots to ground him. Are they gonna be forgotten sometimes? Oh, yes. But, this solid foundation will always go with them.
Shape his life full of opportunities which inspire him to be all he can be with God.
Make sure he knows he has a nest to come home to. Our love is unconditional.
Realize at this point, the “parenting” is pretty much done; we are now in the coaching phase.

I see the shortcomings and misfires in our parenting. This has not been an easy or mistake-free parenting adventure. But, like I told one of my Littles today, we make mistakes, but it has only been done from a heart of love. They aren’t going to like every decision we make, but never forget, it is always made from a place of love.

Love. Real, honest love. This is what makes the wings grow.

Amberly reynolds

sweet sage lane

dreams